I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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