Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Randomize