He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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