He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Randomize