i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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