Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Congratulations! We have a period
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