i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
