used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize
