Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
