"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
