if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
