i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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