don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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