dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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