i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
