Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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