I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
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