Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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