Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
When are your genitals available?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I woke up under a house in Key West
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