this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.