There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
How's work?
Spinning.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
