sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
