Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
im holly from the hills drunk
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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