we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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