you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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