dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Acid is not a monday night drug
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
