Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
