Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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