But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
