I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
