Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Randomize
