well I can't set my house on fire every night
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
We just shotgunned beers for America
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
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