hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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