Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
