let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
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