She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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