Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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