I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
