Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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