He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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