im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
