i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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