Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
