just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize