If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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