Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
