ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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