That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
