THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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