I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Randomize
