What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
