thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
